Psychotherapists and Counsellors Answer your Questions

I have learnt the skill of active listening. I used to be a person who always listened to respond, now I just listen. It has also broadened my thoughts on human behaviours and intentions. Most people...

I have learnt the skill of active listening. I used to be a person who always listened to respond, now I just listen. It has also broadened my thoughts on human behaviours and intentions. Most people feel unheard and to gain attention they change their behaviours, however this is not their true authentic self. I have also learned to really empathise with individuals, to really allow myself to feel their story and guide them in a way that is genuine and transparent.

Therapy has increased my self-awareness and ability to self-reflect enormously and this has enabled all my relationships in life to be stronger and deeper. I have a stronger connection to nature and...

Therapy has increased my self-awareness and ability to self-reflect enormously and this has enabled all my relationships in life to be stronger and deeper. I have a stronger connection to nature and have a deeper understanding of the preciousness of all life and the connection between all humans and the natural world.

Helped me to accept, and finally love myself.

Helped me to accept, and finally love myself.

I caught up with myself and I don't get in my own way as often as I once did. I returned to my art practice. I learned about love.

I caught up with myself and I don't get in my own way as often as I once did. I returned to my art practice. I learned about love.

Therapy has helped me find clarity, self-awareness, and resilience. It provided a safe space to explore my emotions, understand myself better, and develop healthier ways to handle challenges. Through...

Therapy has helped me find clarity, self-awareness, and resilience. It provided a safe space to explore my emotions, understand myself better, and develop healthier ways to handle challenges. Through the process, I’ve experienced personal growth, improved relationships, and a deeper sense of purpose, which inspired me to support others on their journeys.

Both personally and professionally, therapy has made me more compassionate, understanding, empathetic and patient. It has also humbled me immensely. There is something so precious about another human...

Both personally and professionally, therapy has made me more compassionate, understanding, empathetic and patient. It has also humbled me immensely. There is something so precious about another human being trusting you with their vulnerabilities, with their soul. That will always and forever be the greatest honour and privilege I humbly experience.

Therapy has been enormously useful in helping me understand some of my behaviours which were destructive or hurtful to myself or others. By giving me a space to explore these parts of myself I was...

Therapy has been enormously useful in helping me understand some of my behaviours which were destructive or hurtful to myself or others. By giving me a space to explore these parts of myself I was able to understand and make more mindful choices rather than being subjected to impulses or reactions which were not serving me.

I've been lucky to have some wonderful therapists, and therapy has been incredibly helpful and transformative to me. It's helped me develop more compassion for myself, accept parts of myself that I...

I've been lucky to have some wonderful therapists, and therapy has been incredibly helpful and transformative to me. It's helped me develop more compassion for myself, accept parts of myself that I previously wasn't very kind to, and be more able to be myself day to day.

They say that whilst studying counselling you are in fact undergoing therapy yourself . I have found this to be very true. I feel I am much more able to embrace my vulnerabilities and parts of...

They say that whilst studying counselling you are in fact undergoing therapy yourself . I have found this to be very true. I feel I am much more able to embrace my vulnerabilities and parts of myself that I am uncomfortable with and be compassionate to myself. I have also been able to establish better boundaries with people in my life and consequently I feel much more balanced and able to handle life's ups and downs with more ease. I recognize that I am still learning and growing and relish this gift!

I wouldn't be where I am today without therapy. My therapist has been there through my career challenges, life challenges, relational challenges, and supported me in believing I could do what I'm...

I wouldn't be where I am today without therapy. My therapist has been there through my career challenges, life challenges, relational challenges, and supported me in believing I could do what I'm doing. Old Nicky would have said she needed to work for someone, she needed stability and security in being employed. She didn't have the confidence to back herself and follow her passion. Thanks to therapy I have transformed, and continue to grow and change each and every week.

Psychoanalysis has made me more aware of my thoughts, feelings, impulses and choices, and the dynamics at play in my interpersonal relationships.

Psychoanalysis has made me more aware of my thoughts, feelings, impulses and choices, and the dynamics at play in my interpersonal relationships.

By helping me to get to know my own mind better and inspiring me to continue to expand and deepen my journey of self-discovery.

By helping me to get to know my own mind better and inspiring me to continue to expand and deepen my journey of self-discovery.

It's helped me fully accept all parts of me and helped me recognise my innate self-worth. Embodying this self-worth has helped me feel grounded and helped me achieve the things that are most important...

It's helped me fully accept all parts of me and helped me recognise my innate self-worth. Embodying this self-worth has helped me feel grounded and helped me achieve the things that are most important in my life. My life has purpose and meaning and this has come through healing and spirituality.

Therapy has been transformative in my life, helping me navigate my own challenges and gain a deeper understanding of myself and others. It’s taught me the power of resilience, self-awareness, and...

Therapy has been transformative in my life, helping me navigate my own challenges and gain a deeper understanding of myself and others. It’s taught me the power of resilience, self-awareness, and the importance of having a safe space to explore thoughts and feelings. My personal experience with therapy fuels my passion to provide that same supportive environment for others, guiding them toward healing, growth, and positive change. It’s not just about the professional techniques I use; it’s about the genuine belief that therapy can empower anyone to lead a more fulfilling life.

Therapy helps me explore my emotions, thoughts and behaviours; helping me identify my strengths and areas that could use improvements, Therapy also provides me with effective tools to reach my goals.

Therapy helps me explore my emotions, thoughts and behaviours; helping me identify my strengths and areas that could use improvements, Therapy also provides me with effective tools to reach my goals.

My own therapy has resulted in a simple, yet important fact to acknowledge; that I'm human. It's so easy in today's world to expect perfection, both of ourselves and others. We seldom allow ourselves...

My own therapy has resulted in a simple, yet important fact to acknowledge; that I'm human. It's so easy in today's world to expect perfection, both of ourselves and others. We seldom allow ourselves to have bad days, to be upset, to not want to do that one thing we know we should do. Self-compassion is a difficult, yet rewarding quality to foster, and I believe it's something I'll never stop working on. My engagement with the Enneagram has also been very therapeutic, and has given me the tools I need to be able to respond to the challenges I face in life, rather than reacting from an unconscious, and often unhealthy place.

Therapy has made a profound difference in my life, both personally and professionally. On a personal level, engaging in therapy has allowed me to cultivate a deeper understanding of myself, my...

Therapy has made a profound difference in my life, both personally and professionally. On a personal level, engaging in therapy has allowed me to cultivate a deeper understanding of myself, my emotions, and the patterns that have shaped my experiences. It has given me the tools to navigate life's challenges with greater resilience and self-compassion, helping me to grow into a more grounded and authentic version of myself. Through therapy, I have learned the importance of being present, embracing vulnerability, and understanding that healing is an ongoing journey. These insights have not only enhanced my own well-being but have also deepened my empathy and connection with others. Therapy has shown me the value of self-reflection and the power of exploring my inner world, which has enriched my relationships and overall quality of life. Professionally, therapy has provided me with invaluable insights that inform my work as a counsellor and coach. It has reinforced my belief in the transformative power of a safe and supportive therapeutic relationship, where clients can explore their thoughts and feelings without judgment. My own experiences in therapy have shaped the way I approach my clients, allowing me to offer a space of understanding, empathy, and hope. Therapy has also fueled my passion for helping others. It has solidified my commitment to guiding clients on their own journeys of self-discovery, healing, and personal growth. The positive changes I’ve experienced in my own life through therapy inspire me every day to support others in achieving the same sense of empowerment and fulfilment. In essence, therapy has been a cornerstone in my journey towards a more meaningful and balanced life, and it continues to influence and enrich the work I do with my clients at Stabilise Coaching and Counselling Services.

Therapy has given me a place to bring the hard questions and the overwhelming experiences to.

Therapy has given me a place to bring the hard questions and the overwhelming experiences to.

I feel like I have grown and changed a great deal through both the therapy I have undergone myself and and that I now deliver. Each of my clients is a teacher to me. Through therapy I have become more...

I feel like I have grown and changed a great deal through both the therapy I have undergone myself and and that I now deliver. Each of my clients is a teacher to me. Through therapy I have become more patient, understanding, compassionate, balanced, and self-accepting of my shortcomings. Maybe greatest of all, therapy has helped lead to a great emergence and deepening into my identity over time. My personal journey of identity has led to a great affinity with clients with identity issues, especially queer clients, and I learn more and more about my own identity in working with all my clients. To see parts of oneself in all of my clients strengthens my empathy and deepens my connection to humanity.

Therapy has helped me to integrate different parts of myself, to understand myself better, and to have a more loving relationship with myself.

Therapy has helped me to integrate different parts of myself, to understand myself better, and to have a more loving relationship with myself.

It showed me that I made sense, and could be understood, and slowly gave me the tools to understand myself. It's a work in progress, but therapy continues to help me unravel the parts of myself that I...

It showed me that I made sense, and could be understood, and slowly gave me the tools to understand myself. It's a work in progress, but therapy continues to help me unravel the parts of myself that I couldn't even look at alone.

Self acceptance.

Self acceptance.

I often remember my clients when I'm doing something I find challenging - one woman I worked with experienced very intense anxiety but continually turned up to things she valued, and I found it so...

I often remember my clients when I'm doing something I find challenging - one woman I worked with experienced very intense anxiety but continually turned up to things she valued, and I found it so inspiring that keeping her courage in mind has really helped me persist in things that I found meaningful but pretty scary to try! A big impact of undergoing my own therapy was that I became much less scared of my own inner experience, which had the unexpected side effect of making me feel much less judgmental or scared of other people!

Therapy has played a significant role in my personal growth and transformation, making me a better person in many ways. Through the therapeutic process, I have gained a deeper understanding of myself,...

Therapy has played a significant role in my personal growth and transformation, making me a better person in many ways. Through the therapeutic process, I have gained a deeper understanding of myself, my emotions, and my patterns of thinking and behavior. Therapy has provided me with valuable tools and techniques to navigate challenges, manage stress, and develop healthier coping strategies. I have learned to cultivate self-compassion, embrace vulnerability, and practice effective communication skills. Therapy has helped me uncover and heal from past wounds, fostering personal resilience and emotional well-being. It has empowered me to make positive changes, set boundaries, and live a more authentic and fulfilling life. Overall, therapy has been instrumental in enhancing my self-awareness, fostering personal growth, and enabling me to show up as a better version of myself in all aspects of my life.

It has allowed me to live an honest life full of creativity and relationships with others. I have more awareness and clarity of what is important to me.

It has allowed me to live an honest life full of creativity and relationships with others. I have more awareness and clarity of what is important to me.

A more steady, trustworthy, vibrant and fluid sense of self. A greater capacity to stay present with different aspects of life, the “good” and the “bad”, the mundane and the extraordinary....

A more steady, trustworthy, vibrant and fluid sense of self. A greater capacity to stay present with different aspects of life, the “good” and the “bad”, the mundane and the extraordinary.

Laura loves to be of service to others and to witness how people can heal themselves, realising that they don't have to be stuck and can come back to alignment and healing in a grounded way. Her...

Laura loves to be of service to others and to witness how people can heal themselves, realising that they don't have to be stuck and can come back to alignment and healing in a grounded way. Her work also helps her to be centred, humbled and connected to her own path.

In so many ways! I'm both a client of therapy, and a therapist, and both of these ways have transformed my life in significant ways. I have been in and out of therapy at different points in my life...

In so many ways! I'm both a client of therapy, and a therapist, and both of these ways have transformed my life in significant ways. I have been in and out of therapy at different points in my life since I was 16, and it has meant that I have learnt different ways to understand myself, and find better ways of coping. I also use the therapeutic techniques I use with my clients, on myself.

Therapy has informed me, not necessarily to be a better person, but to learn from clients, invest in keeping up with current trends and emerging theories and to look after my own mental health.

Therapy has informed me, not necessarily to be a better person, but to learn from clients, invest in keeping up with current trends and emerging theories and to look after my own mental health.

It has made me more aware of my own feelings and inner motivations.

It has made me more aware of my own feelings and inner motivations.

Self-awareness is the master variable in life. It gives you greater control over your actions and helps you live a more deliberate and satisfying life. I've experienced first-hand how therapy helps to...

Self-awareness is the master variable in life. It gives you greater control over your actions and helps you live a more deliberate and satisfying life. I've experienced first-hand how therapy helps to build this awareness and empower you in the process.

I hope so but it's not for me to say

I hope so but it's not for me to say

Therapy has opened my eyes to just how resilient and strong people are, as well as given me insights into my own life, strengthened my ways of coping, and improved how I communicate with others.

Therapy has opened my eyes to just how resilient and strong people are, as well as given me insights into my own life, strengthened my ways of coping, and improved how I communicate with others.

There are three parts of a Lacanian training; theoretical studies, supervision of one's cases, and one's own personal psychoanalysis. A Lacanian analyst has already grappled with their unconscious in...

There are three parts of a Lacanian training; theoretical studies, supervision of one's cases, and one's own personal psychoanalysis. A Lacanian analyst has already grappled with their unconscious in order to better work with their analysands and thus not get caught up in a transference that badly effects the work. For me, this makes the analyst much more open to witnessing, analysing and working with the analysand.

Analysis has had profound effects, not necessarily in changing who we are, but in the understanding and acceptance of ourselves.

Analysis has had profound effects, not necessarily in changing who we are, but in the understanding and acceptance of ourselves.

My own struggles led me to seek help from a therapist, which has been one of the most transformative experiences of my life. Therapy has helped me to understand and be more accepting of myself and...

My own struggles led me to seek help from a therapist, which has been one of the most transformative experiences of my life. Therapy has helped me to understand and be more accepting of myself and enabled me to extend this to others.

Psychotherapy and meditation together have made me infinitely more happy in myself and with the world around me. It has given me a deeper trust in my skills, capacities and sense of self-worth.

Psychotherapy and meditation together have made me infinitely more happy in myself and with the world around me. It has given me a deeper trust in my skills, capacities and sense of self-worth.

I have been in therapy since i was a late adolescent and through that time become more whole and myself.

I have been in therapy since i was a late adolescent and through that time become more whole and myself.

We are usually quick to seek help for our physical needs, be it a doctor, dentist or physiotherapist. Seeking support for our emotional and mental health needs helps the all of me feel stronger and...

We are usually quick to seek help for our physical needs, be it a doctor, dentist or physiotherapist. Seeking support for our emotional and mental health needs helps the all of me feel stronger and more equipped.

Therapy has given me back my life. It set me free of prejudice and fixed ideas about how creativity happens. It helps me not buckle under pressure and it helps me turn adversity into opportunity.

Therapy has given me back my life. It set me free of prejudice and fixed ideas about how creativity happens. It helps me not buckle under pressure and it helps me turn adversity into opportunity.

From personal experience, I have seen therapy create massive life-long positive life change and happiness.

From personal experience, I have seen therapy create massive life-long positive life change and happiness.

The study in counselling is in itself a catalyst for therapy. My whole counselling journey has been reflective and more so after delving into my inner most being. There is a sense of awareness which...

The study in counselling is in itself a catalyst for therapy. My whole counselling journey has been reflective and more so after delving into my inner most being. There is a sense of awareness which was absent in my life.

Without a doubt. Therapy has given me the ability to become self aware, to navigate, and transition through overwhelming thoughts, feelings and behaviours, provided me with self-regulation...

Without a doubt. Therapy has given me the ability to become self aware, to navigate, and transition through overwhelming thoughts, feelings and behaviours, provided me with self-regulation strategies and helped me identify and build healthier habits so I can continue to move towards the life I want to live. I truely believe that the greatest relationship one will ever have is the one they have with themselves. This then becomes the springboard to the quality of all the other relationships you have in the other areas of your life.

It has provided me with a safe space for my own inner journey, and to accept that none of us are responsible for holding up the sky for everyone else all of the time. And while it is important to...

It has provided me with a safe space for my own inner journey, and to accept that none of us are responsible for holding up the sky for everyone else all of the time. And while it is important to work towards improving our self-awareness and personal growth, we can only do the best that we can under the circumstances - we have to accept that sometimes that is enough, which I think has helped to make me a better person, parent and counsellor.

Therapy, and in particular Focusing, has brought me greater self-awareness, reflectiveness, and curiosity about my inner world. My relationship with myself has changed deeply, which has greatly...

Therapy, and in particular Focusing, has brought me greater self-awareness, reflectiveness, and curiosity about my inner world. My relationship with myself has changed deeply, which has greatly impacted who I am personally and who I am in my relationships with others. Being open to- and cultivating my own inner knowing allows me to be a better therapist with clients. As we embark on the therapy journey together, I help clients organically to find their sense of groundedness. From here comes an inner calm from which to carry life forward in a way that feels right for them.

More empathetic and less black and white in my thinking.

More empathetic and less black and white in my thinking.

I have uncovered my main blind spots and also triggers. I have refined my coping and self-regulation skills. And this has enabled to show up in a much better way with my friends, family and my...

I have uncovered my main blind spots and also triggers. I have refined my coping and self-regulation skills. And this has enabled to show up in a much better way with my friends, family and my community.

Therapy has added 'purpose' in my life! This journey is like no other and I proudly have devoted my whole journey towards assisting as many client(s) I am trained to assist. Being a therapist has...

Therapy has added 'purpose' in my life! This journey is like no other and I proudly have devoted my whole journey towards assisting as many client(s) I am trained to assist. Being a therapist has made me both a full-time worker as well as a full-time student, in which I am always learning new & improved methods to add to my practice, in order to better assist my clients with their unique experiences, issues and goals.

I think everyone should be in therapy! It's wonderful to be able to talk with someone without fear of judgement. Someone who is going to really listen. Someone who you can say anything to, nut things...

I think everyone should be in therapy! It's wonderful to be able to talk with someone without fear of judgement. Someone who is going to really listen. Someone who you can say anything to, nut things out or rehearse things before doing it in real life. I've been to personal therapy and couples therapy and both have been very helpful. I shopped around though and found the right person for me. It took time but it was worth it. I also have regular professional supervision which ensures that I am at my best professionally.

I have become a more thoughtful and understanding person. I am more accepting of difference and understand that everyone has a valuable life story.

I have become a more thoughtful and understanding person. I am more accepting of difference and understand that everyone has a valuable life story.

All the inner work that I have done over the years, has helped me to develop a greater willingness to experience anything that comes to meet me in life. It has also made me more aware of my own...

All the inner work that I have done over the years, has helped me to develop a greater willingness to experience anything that comes to meet me in life. It has also made me more aware of my own personal emotional trigger points. Having grown up in a family that had high expectations of me, I used to project onto my partners, that they also had such high expectations of me and that I was responsible for fulfilling those needs for them. This put me under a lot of pressure and led to over-responsibility. Together with an inability to express my own needs in relationship or to believe that I had any right to any needs, I created over time, a build up of resentment. I expressed my resentment by either becoming withdrawn, withholding, being grumpy or simply cancelling the relationship and moving on to a new one and repeating the same dynamics. Therapy has helped me to become more conscious and to change my ability to balance the need to take care of myself and the need to take care of others. It helped me to grow in love within my marriage and towards my children and not only to embrace my emotions and vulnerabilities but also to be more grounded in my Being.

It has certainly held a mirror up to me and shown me how to own all the parts of myself, even those I don't like. It has made me a better parent and partner, but I am still learning, Everyday.

It has certainly held a mirror up to me and shown me how to own all the parts of myself, even those I don't like. It has made me a better parent and partner, but I am still learning, Everyday.

It's given me more insight and self-awareness and helped me respond to difficulties much better. I'm a more patient person and more accepting of the parts of myself that I struggle to love, which in...

It's given me more insight and self-awareness and helped me respond to difficulties much better. I'm a more patient person and more accepting of the parts of myself that I struggle to love, which in turn has made me more accepting of others.

As the cliché has it, it's not the goal, it's the journey'! Therapists are no less flawed than anyone else. Indeed most have to a greater or lesser extent suffered, and the process of...

As the cliché has it, it's not the goal, it's the journey'! Therapists are no less flawed than anyone else. Indeed most have to a greater or lesser extent suffered, and the process of recovery, learning and the consolidation of this learning into one's lifestyle brings about beneficial and lasting change. My journey continues to be probed with curiosity, learning, mindfulness and tested in relationship. It is character changing and character building.

It's scary for me to imagine my life if I hadn't done the therapy I have. I am undoubtedly more relaxed, sleep well and am less reactive (oversensitive).

It's scary for me to imagine my life if I hadn't done the therapy I have. I am undoubtedly more relaxed, sleep well and am less reactive (oversensitive).

Therapy has provided me with a broad range of perspective into life and the human condition. Learning from my clients has made me a wiser and more balanced human being. I am inspired by humans and...

Therapy has provided me with a broad range of perspective into life and the human condition. Learning from my clients has made me a wiser and more balanced human being. I am inspired by humans and their resilience.

Being an ISTDP therapist has deepened my compassion and empathy for the patient and myself. It has honed my listening skills, my observation skills when I experience my mirror neutrons firing, as my...

Being an ISTDP therapist has deepened my compassion and empathy for the patient and myself. It has honed my listening skills, my observation skills when I experience my mirror neutrons firing, as my patient experiences their grief and sadness about how they may have spent a lifetime disregarding their own feelings.

Once in a while I will go on a cleaning frenzy where I pick everything out of a draw or a cupboard, spread it on the floor, sort what it useful or not useful and then put everything back in a more...

Once in a while I will go on a cleaning frenzy where I pick everything out of a draw or a cupboard, spread it on the floor, sort what it useful or not useful and then put everything back in a more cohesive and organised way. When I see a counsellor or therapist (which I do 3-4 times a year), I usually call it a Mental Tidy. It gives me space to go through the things that I have been thinking and feeling, figure out what has been helpful for me and what is holding me back before deciding what I want to maintain in my life. For me personally, this is one of the most powerful uses of therapy - to examine where you are at when nothing is particularly wrong. Then when hard times do arise, I feel more able to deal with them.

Happier and more accepting of myself. Being less anxious, less fearful, more confident, having feelings of gladness.

Happier and more accepting of myself. Being less anxious, less fearful, more confident, having feelings of gladness.

In so many ways, perhaps the most significant is that it has taught me to be self compassionate

In so many ways, perhaps the most significant is that it has taught me to be self compassionate

I continually learn about my self and the world as I work with people. Being a therapist has expanded my viewpoint and stressed the importance of living within your values and acting towards your best...

I continually learn about my self and the world as I work with people. Being a therapist has expanded my viewpoint and stressed the importance of living within your values and acting towards your best self and acceptance of your ess than best self.

Therapy has made me a better person by improving my self worth and giving me insights into my life and life relationships. I have gained an understanding and awareness of how to let go of negative...

Therapy has made me a better person by improving my self worth and giving me insights into my life and life relationships. I have gained an understanding and awareness of how to let go of negative thinking and improve my positive thinking. The change in my thought process has given me great insight into the power of negative thinking and persistent annoyances, by using appropriate tools, I have become happier and more confident in life also making the people around me happier and more confident.

Of course! It is very humbling to bear witness and I understand rank and privilege in our society in a deeper way.

Of course! It is very humbling to bear witness and I understand rank and privilege in our society in a deeper way.

Made me more accepting of being human with all its frailties.

Made me more accepting of being human with all its frailties.

Therapy has helped me to learn to communicate, to regulate my emotions, to be a better listener. It has also helped me understand how the experiences I had as a child have shaped me and continue to...

Therapy has helped me to learn to communicate, to regulate my emotions, to be a better listener. It has also helped me understand how the experiences I had as a child have shaped me and continue to impact on the ways that I relate as an adult. It has helped me feel more connected to my parter, and be a better partner, parent and friend.

For me, the great gift of therapy has been forgiveness. I am now much better at forgiving myself for my imperfections and empathising with others, which means I am able to love more fully than I could...

For me, the great gift of therapy has been forgiveness. I am now much better at forgiving myself for my imperfections and empathising with others, which means I am able to love more fully than I could before.