Eleni Kidis

A conversation with Eleni Kidis

• What led you to choose psychotherapy or counselling as a profession?

  When I initially entered university I knew I wanted to work with children, but I didn't want to be a teacher. My own childhood experiences and upbringing led me to this desire. I remember somebody mentioning doing Social Work, but I didn't really have any idea what that was. So I did some research and discovered that volunteer work was a prerequisite for entering a post graduate in Social Work. I eventually found voluntary work with very challenging and disengaged children. I remember being told to f*** off by an 8 year old and having to coax them down from the roof of the building in my second week of being there. I was hooked! The rest is history....

• Which philosophical approaches have influenced your professional development?

  Definitely the philosophical/spiritual teachings of non-dual eastern traditions such as Tantrik Yoga, Daoism and Buddhism. These traditions very much espouse being completely in the moment, exactly as it is arising, moment to moment. Learning to be with this without avoidance and attachment is where the healing magic happens.
  Tantrik yoga places a huge emphasis on working with our emotions and transmuting them for higher purposes of spiritual development. That's why I am drawn to, and have trained in therapeutic approaches such as Emotional Focused Therapy and Family Constellations and Radical Exposure Tapping. These modalities require us to experience and feel into what's happening in our body in each moment when we talk about our issues in therapy. This helps us access our deepest emotions and to move from our secondary to our primary emotions. The therapist is carefully attuned to observing what is happening within the client, within themselves and the relational process between client and therapist. It's working very experientially and phenomenologically.

• Which particular aspects of health or the human journey are you interested in?

  Our very first relationships with our parents help to shape how we feel about ourselves, how we feel and experience others and how we feel and experience the world. If we get stuck in these fractured relationships and ensuing emotions, it's really hard for us to feel a strong sense of self. We can get stuck in avoidance/repression or attachment, with negative consequences on our psycho-emotional and physical health. If we don't resolve this it holds us back in our evolution and trully discovering the truth of what it means to be human. We loose purpose and meaning to our life, leading to a sens e of disconnection to our selves and the greatness of existence and spirit. How can we really know the greatness of this human birth if we hate ourselves and life. So, I love helping people move past these blocks to discover something grater for themselves and life.

• What methods do you use?

  Emotional Focused Therapy, Radical Exposure Tapping, trauma-informed practice, somatic practices, Family Constellation work, mindfulness, meditation, yoga, strengths-based practice, attachment theory, parts work, inner child work

• When do you think the client will start to feel that progress is being made?

  This questions is a little difficult to answer. I think it depends on the client and how willing they are to commit to the process of therapy. To make good progress, consistently attending weekly sessions are best for at least 3-6 months. Easing off to fortnightly for another 3- 6 months is good. Some people will need weekly sessions for 1-2 years.
  It takes a while for a therapist to get a good sense of someone and their life, and it takes time for client to fully trust and speak openly and truthfully to a therapist without falling into shame and self-loathing. It’s okay that clients move tentatively to begin with. However, I consider that progress is being made when someone is willing to self-reflect without beating themselves up all the time. When banished emotions are reclaimed, people are truly moving towards healing.
  

• How has therapy made a difference in your life?

  It's helped me fully accept all parts of me and helped me recognise my innate self-worth. Embodying this self-worth has helped me feel grounded and helped me achieve the things that are most important in my life. My life has purpose and meaning and this has come through healing and spirituality.

• What do you like most about being a therapist?

  Oh....there are so many things I really like about being a therapist. There is a certain sacredness to holding space and meeting people exactly where they are at. It feels meaningful and purposeful. Being able to listen to the adversity people have faced in life, and then help guide them through this, towards transformation is extremely fulfilling. I believe that we all have natural capabilities in life that we should all harness, and I think being a therapist is how I harness mine. Life is hard, I'm a big believer in learning and unlearning things about human existence, investing in self-reflection and growing beyond our limitations and self-perceptions. I live my life from this perspective and it naturally extends out to how I am as a therapist.

• Do you ever have 'bad hair' days?

  Of course I do... I am human after all. Our energy, moods, outlook and daily life experiences shift with each moment and with each day, bringing a different flavour to how we experience the present moment with clients. Some days are just "bad hair days". When I am having these kind of days, I always like to remind myself that clients place their trust in me and pay me to guide them through their challenges. I value and respect this deeply. With age and experience these days have become less and less, as I've learnt to put aside my stuff and be completely present for each client.

• What do you think is the most significant problem we face, in the world today?

  Disconnection from ourselves, from spirit and to the boundlessness of existence.

• Can you share the name of a book, film, song, event or work of art that inspires you?

  Anything to do with the teachings and practices of non-dual Tantrik yoga and philosophy. This spiritual traditions is life affirming and teaches us how to navigate human embodiement, how to work with our emotions, how to recognise and how to move beyond our conditioning, to truly know the depths of human existence.