Mr Reed Everingham

A conversation with Reed Everingham

• What led you to choose psychotherapy or counselling as a profession?

  During my early twenties, I had my first encounter with psychotherapy. Working with a wonderful practitioner for several years profoundly imprinted on me. For the first time, I truly understood what it felt like to repair, grow, and change. Thirty-plus years later, this experience set me on a path of personal development to better understand myself and others. As a result, I pursued studies in relational and person-centred therapies and obtained postgraduate qualifications in Counselling and Psychotherapy.

• Which philosophical approaches have influenced your professional development?

  I enjoy the idea that existence is an embodied experience and that we can learn and grow by connecting our thoughts with feelings grounded in the body. This connection between body and mind is fundamental to most change processes. This philosophical and relational approach helps me live a more authentic and self-determined life, especially when facing challenges. I also draw on mindfulness and compassion practices. They are essential in therapy and can help us understand, reframe, and address the root causes of distress.

• Which particular aspects of health or the human journey are you interested in?

  I am intrigued by all stages of the human experience, and I work with diverse clients. However, I am particularly interested in those moments when we may feel stuck or outside of our experience of life. If meaning and regulation are found in a state of flow, my work centres on helping individuals move from a place of distress to a position filled with purpose, connection, and momentum.

• What methods do you use?

  My therapeutic approach is grounded in person-centred and trauma-informed methodologies. Additionally, my practice is influenced by theories of mindfulness, Attachment Theory, and counselling psychology.

• When do you think the client will start to feel that progress is being made?

  Transformation can begin once a client feels heard, seen, and understood without judgment. Progress is different for everyone and may not always include catharsis. However, progress is made when a client feels safe to explore their feelings and distress. Reaching out for help is often the first step in the change process and can already signify progress.

• How has therapy made a difference in your life?

  I have done individual therapy and couples therapy with my partner. I have studied and read extensively, and I love the calm that comes from knowing myself better. I don’t oscillate as wildly as I used to, and I now mostly feel grounded, focused and on path. I’m more aware of my patterns and acknowledge the need for ongoing reflective practice. Finally, I am gentler with myself when I get it wrong, self-compassion being central to my daily practice.

• What do you like most about being a therapist?

  It is an honour and a privilege to be in the therapy chair. I cultivate safe, open client relationships and witness their joy and pain. It humbles me to see people work so hard to grow and change, better themselves, and step into the flow of their lives with meaning and purpose. People are a unique and never-ending source of inspiration.

• Do you ever have 'bad hair' days?

  Yes, both literally and metaphorically! Like everyone else, I am broken yet beautiful. I strive to stay authentic, feel my emotions, and lead a life with meaning. However, life can be unpredictable, and we all carry emotional baggage. On days when I feel down, I try to stay present, learn from my experiences, and view them as part of my journey rather than the end goal. Every day is an opportunity to learn and grow.

• What do you think is the most significant problem we face, in the world today?

  In the Western world, many people struggle to find meaning and purpose in their daily lives. We are bombarded with messages from the media that make us feel inadequate, and it can be challenging to care for ourselves and others while also contributing positively to society and the planet. One of the main reasons for this struggle is that we have lost sight of the fact that every life is unique and valuable and that each of us has the power to shape the world we live in.

• Can you share the name of a book, film, song, event or work of art that inspires you?

  This question is challenging as life is full of wonder and inspired moments. Reflecting on the human condition, one of my all-time favourite films is Little Miss Sunshine (2006). It touches on so much—what it means to be vulnerable, to trust, to experience joy, to break down, to regret, to grow, change, triumph, and finally dance like no one is watching.