Mr Graeme James

A conversation with Graeme James

• What led you to choose psychotherapy or counselling as a profession?

  I didn't want to be a counsellor or therapist. Initially I worked in marketing. After years of encouragement from a friend I finally became a volunteer Lifeline counsellor way back in 1987. Very quickly I grew up on the telephones and came to realise how very complex and demanding life is. When I left the corporate world I retrained, became engaged in managing Lifeline centres, started a private practice, and went on to work in counsellor education. So you might say I now have a passion for the field.

• Which philosophical approaches have influenced your professional development?

  No one particular approach is right for everyone. Usually one approach or another will resonate with us more than others. Learning how to be a therapist and work with others requires much more than going to university and engaging in supervision. It also means engaging in our own personal work and learning who we are as a therapist and what we bring to the work with clients. So my influences are diverse. I am drawn to psychodynamic and analytic ideas from my own experience as a client; person/client centred/ humanistic and strengths approaches form working with Lifeline; cognitive behavioural approaches from my time with Medibank Health and Beyondblue; and systemic, narrative, constructivist and post modern approaches from my university training. I have done quite a bit of living in my time working in this profession, so underpinning everything, I am an existentialist. We all face challenges making meaning from life's ups and downs.

• Which particular aspects of health or the human journey are you interested in?

  I am interested in how we grow and develop as people. We take in experiences when we are little and over time, have to navigate life when we are big. Sometimes we have good experiences to draw from, and sometimes not. Change and development can involve trauma and loss as well as more safe and supportive experiences. Some experiences are truly awful. While we can't change what has happened to us, these things can in time help us to learn and grow as people. We are not static but rather dynamic and changing. We tell ourselves stories about who we are and who we can be, or others tell these stories about us. For many of us, our challenge is to discover how to be ourselves. Much of my work is about helping people to slowly but surely unpack and discover this. It might more readily be called anxiety, depression, living with trauma, or relationship difficulties. I help people understand themselves and their relationships in and with life. Who am I amid the context of life's difficulties? What shaped me and who am I becoming? What is important to me in life now? How can I live more fully in the context of my life?

• What methods do you use?

  I am an integrated therapist. I draw from differing approaches depending upon your difficulties, interests, abilities and readiness for change. I don't work with every person in exactly the same way. Rather I tailor my approach to your circumstances. What the research (e.g. Asay and Lambert, or Norcross and Lambert) says is that is that method or technique only accounts for about 15% of why therapy works. 40% of improvement can be attributed to clients themselves - your strengths, amount of support, persistence, curiosity and motivation to learn from your circumstances, and even the events of life when things go better. The next, 30% comes from the quality of relationship between you and me - that it be caring, genuine, affirming, and encouraging. It should feel like working with me is a good fit for you. What becomes important regarding methods, is that the way I choose to work with you should help you to make sense of why you feel the way you do. I draw from psychodynamic, cognitive behavioural, humanistic, existential, strengths, systemic and emotionally focussed approaches.

• When do you think the client will start to feel that progress is being made?

  Often people tell me that the first thing they feel is some relief from sharing their story and being heard in a non-judgemental relationship with me. I try to bring an empathic and gentle curiosity so that people can explore their story and understand themselves better. Life can be pretty challenging going forwards, and often it seems to make more sense looking backwards. When people can look back and notice themselves changing, session by session, becoming more competent, coping better, facing difficulties without suffering so much with their problems, then they can begin to tell a story of change and progress. I have had clients tell me things like, 'I still have the same feelings and reactions to life's events, however, they no longer get the better of me. They don't trigger or frighten me so I am able to manage better now' (numerous clients and not a direct quote). This kind of change leads to increased hope. Interestingly, hope and expectancy that counselling or therapy will help provide the remaining 15% of what leads to good outcomes in therapy.

• How has therapy made a difference in your life?

  I have been a client, practice as a therapist, supervise other therapists and also train counsellors and therapists. Each of these experiences provides an opportunity for me to learn by reflecting upon myself and life. These different lenses into therapy help me to I understand what it is like to have difficulties, and to also work with them over time towards improvement. I think it is important that any therapist you might wish to see has some insight into suffering, and not just from a text book. The research (e.g. Norcross) shows that most therapists deeply value their own therapy, as do I. This is the real seat and foundation of therapist learning more so than any training - as it has been for me. Importantly, therapy is not a one sided deal. It takes two. Therapists help their clients to change. Clients are also remarkable and resourceful people too. So clients can inspire their therapists too. It is a reciprocal process sometimes, something the text books don't often mention. It is however incumbent upon therapists to manage our selves so as not to adversely interfere with your progress.

• What do you like most about being a therapist?

  It is a thoughtful, purposeful and meaningful way to live. The work is stimulating and it is great to see people grow and develop over time.

• Do you ever have 'bad hair' days?

  Therapists are people too. While the context of everyone's life is different, we all have potential for 'bad hair' days. Why should it be any different for therapists? The world will shift and change around me just like it will for you. My responsibility to you however is to manage what is mine so it doesn't adversely influence what is yours. I do this by engaging in reflective practice about my work. Just as I supervise other therapists I also engage in supervision online with a senior clinician in a capital city. To manage confidentiality I do not reveal details of client identities.
  

• What do you think is the most significant problem we face, in the world today?

  Everything is changing in a fast paced, socially and technologically connected world. It can amplify or detract from the meaning of everything. Whether we are young or old, most of us face changes of how to be ourselves at some point in time. This can take many forms like anxiety or depression for example. Along side of this, most of us like to know that we matter to loved ones, friends or family. The areas I most enjoy working upon involve some growth in our sense of self about who we are and can be in the world, and how to relate with others or ourselves better.

• Can you share the name of a book, film, song, event or work of art that inspires you?

  I like many forms of music, art and film, though tend to be drawn to music of my era like prog rock or contemporary jazz and fusion - each requires active engagement from the listener, a bit like therapy itself.