Amber Barry

A conversation with Amber Barry

• What led you to choose psychotherapy or counselling as a profession?

  I chose to be a counsellor because I enjoy helping people. I know, cliche, right!? It's true though. I am also interested in connecting with people on a deeper level - and learning more about their inner world. I have always been a good listener and an empathic person; the kind of person who would have strangers share with me their vulnerability and pain.
  I enjoy human psychology, and getting to the 'roots' of an issue. I love my work, and feel extremely privileged to be able to walk alongside my clients on their journey.

• Which philosophical approaches have influenced your professional development?

  Social justice and feminist therapy frameworks have influenced me because it is through these that we get to explore and understand how a person's identity and experience shapes them and their mental health. I am, at my core, a person-centred and integrative therapist, but the cultural elements of social justice/feminist therapy add something to my work that helps my clients make sense of their story in new ways.

• Which particular aspects of health or the human journey are you interested in?

  I am interested in parentification, women's trauma, perfectionism, and people-pleasing. These are traits I come across often when working alongside women who have experienced childhood and adult traumas, and who also experience anxiety. I am interested in working with these (and more) as 'parts' of self - and working with women to learn to 'unlearn' them, or to re-purpose them.
  
  I am also interested in a holistic perspective of health. I believe we must lay a foundation of healthy lifestyle habits and helpful social supports whilst we also learn new mental health skills.

• What methods do you use?

  I am what we call an Integrative counsellor. This basically means I am trained in a few different types of therapy, and I use tools from each to make sure that my clients and I are working together in a way that is tailored to them as individuals. When this is not done, therapy feels "cookie cutter-esque" and is not personalised.
  
  The types of therapy and tools I use often include: parts work, strengths works, narrative therapy, goal setting, motivational interviewing, cognitive-behavioural-therapy, feminist therapy, solutions-focused-therapy, and inner child work. I sometimes use Bibliotherapy too (using books and other texts).

• When do you think the client will start to feel that progress is being made?

  Every client is different. Therapeutic progress can look and feel different for everyone. For some people, progress is getting into a routine of getting out of bed and brushing their teeth daily. For others, progress might look like finally setting and holding boundaries with that toxic family member. For others it's a subtle shift inside - where suddenly they notice they have let go of anger, or actually 'like' themselves. So a timeline is hard to predict.
  
  Change depends on the effort you are willing to put in. I work with women who are ready for change, and who are engaging in therapy and also putting in to place new tools outside of the therapy session. When we work together, I will check in with you to see how you feel things are going. I value your input and feedback and want to make sure we are focusing on YOUR goals.
  

• How has therapy made a difference in your life?

  I like to practice what I preach. I have attended my own therapy on and off for a few years. I love it. It's nice to have that place to go, talk, learn and grow. My own therapy makes me a better counsellor. I am open about it because I believe there is no room for stigma when it comes to therapy and mental health. If you are choosing you, wanting to show up for you, that is worth celebrating - not hiding.
  
  I have tried different types of therapy, from cognitive-behavioural-therapy to group therapy to email therapy. I have joined women's circles and wellness retreats (this was me really getting out of my own comfort zone!). I am a big believer in trying something, seeing how/if it fits and then deciding whether or not it's for you.
  
  I will be a forever student when it comes to self-knowledge and growth.

• What do you like most about being a therapist?

  Connecting with people.
  Seeing that shift when people begin to believe in their own strength and capabilities.

• Do you ever have 'bad hair' days?

  Plenty!
  And as far as telehealth goes, I want you to show up as you are. Get comfortable, come as you are. Just be you.

• What do you think is the most significant problem we face, in the world today?

  There's a lot to choose from. I sit in a very privileged position (I'm Australian, educated and white). So any answer I have will come from that privileged space and will inevitably minimise a number of lived experiences and issues around the globe.
  My answer, with this in mind is: misogyny. Women all over - especially Indigenous women in Australia - still share a collective experience of sexism and misogyny that negatively impacts our mental wellbeing. We grow up being hypervigilant, hyper aware of our own safety, and we self-abandon because we are taught to to be a girl/woman is to take care of other people AT THE detriment to our own goals and needs. We are reminded, as individuals and collectively, that there are many people who still believe women/girls are inferior and less than men/boys, globally. Times are changing - but the impact of this misogyny is pervasive. This is why I focus my private practice on listening to, supporting, uplifting, and guiding, women.

• Can you share the name of a book, film, song, event or work of art that inspires you?

  Book: Goddesses In Everywoman by Jean Shinoda Bolen, MD.